Some of the rules of dogdom include:
If there are ten rawhide chew chips on the floor only one of them is the right one to chew on for any dog in the vicinity.
The favored chew chip is subject to being stolen and then stolen back.
The favored chew chip changes daily.
Non-favored chew chips are ignored and may be harvested by the Dog Mom for reuse on following days.
A favored hiding place for chew chips is under Dog Mom’s pillow.
Squeaky toys are prized above non-squeaky toys.
Squeaky toys are to be desqueaked as soon as possible, then discarded for toys that can be mined for a squeaker.
The object of stuffed toys is disembowelment.
There is an infinite amount of white stuffing available in any disemboweled toy, in contravention of the laws of physics.
The smaller the disemboweled toy the more stuffing is available as they are magical bags of holding.
If the human tries to play tug of war with one dog, both dogs are required to participate, leaving the human with no tug partner.
All things must be fair and equal, except for those things which are unfair and unequal, in which case it is up to a barking contest to settle the dispute.